thắc mắc Dạng solution-effect nhưng em hơi bí ideas, nhưng viết như này ổn k ạ

toanphusv

Senior Member
Đề bài : In some countries, young people have become richer, healthier and live longer but they are less happy. Causes and Address

Bài làm

It is widely argued that young people have more money, good health and long longevity but they are sad. This essay attempts to shed light on the driving factors behind this negative view before outlining several viable solutions that should be adopted to tackle this problem

There are two primary reasons as to why the young often be sad but they has a more money, good health and long longevity. One reason is that is that they have to take care their offspring. According to a study by BBC related to reason for breeding in 2016, around 60% of the people surveyed said that they had started having a baby because of long exposure on the violent resource like zxzz.com, which might have an undesirable influence on the young who are studying. Another reason is that the enormous cost incurred to build recreational areas for the young would put a strain on government coffers. As a result, this could lead to budge deficits, tax hike, or reduced social welfare, thereby forcing ordinary citizens, especially the underprivileged, to struggle even more to earn a living.



To combat this worry concern, the following feasible steps should be taken. First and foremost, the yound should attending educational courses related to sexuality. As a result, the young could be able to be aware of their behavior with their lover, thereby making them better prepare for various problems that they might encounter in the future. Furthermore, governing bodies should spend more money on recreational areas. For example, they could build more parks, shopping centers in their country, which could attract the young have more places to hang out in their freetime.



In conclusion, there are some underlying motives behind the young tend to be sad while they have strong finance, good health and live longer, and it is crucial that the aforementioned measures be implemented to change this oppositional perspective
 
Bác chụp lại phần nháp khi viết bài này của bác để mình biết bác brainstorm với lên dàn ý thế nào được không?
 
Bác chụp lại phần nháp khi viết bài này của bác để mình biết bác brainstorm với lên dàn ý thế nào được không?
e k nghĩ nổi bác ạ, kiểu chỉ nghĩ do nó có time nên quan hệ tình dục dẫn đến có con trc tuổi, và k đủ tiền xây công viên
 
There are two primary reasons as to why the young often be sad but they has a more money, good health and long longevity. One reason is that is that they have to take care their offspring.
Ý của bạn trong câu này là gì??

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There are two primary reasons as to why the young often be sad but they has a more money, good health and long longevity. One reason is that is that they have to take care their offspring.
Ý của bạn trong câu này là gì??

Để ý các lỗi ngữ pháp căn bản đc bôi đậm
e viết câu ghép ạ, kiểu họ buồn vì họ quan hệ tình d** vì tiếp xúc phim 18+ nhiều dẫn đến có con trc ý muốn
 
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