For this holiday, I got 3 days off, I could get more but it would be bad for the workers since they make money day by day, so I fought and settled for 3 days only.
But 3 days was too short of a time to go back to my home town, and too long of a time to stay put near the construction site. So I borrowed a bike and went to the nearest tourism city.
Even though I had a bike with me, I still walked a lot. I strolled down the beach twice a day, I wandered three different mountains. I walked to any coffee shop near me instead of riding my bike. And it eased my mind.
My mind had been troubled for a while now, and somehow just by walking, my mind did not wander to uncertain places. Usually, when I let my mind go free, it will go to darkest corner. But this time, it just stayed still, it didn't go anywhere, and no thought came upon it.
Maybe the exhaustion of the body helped clearing the mind. But I knew this was untrue because the last time I worked myself to exhaustion, the effect upon my mind was tenfold.
Perhaps, it was the sound of the shoving waves, the innocence of the children running along the beach, the strange calmness of the mountains and forests.
Maybe that what they call living in the now, merely exist with no thought of the past or future, just simply exist in that moment itself.
The journey perhaps gifted me with no joy, for no joy can be found in that lonesome state. But it has granted me some peace of mind, maybe just for some little precious moments, and that was enough.
The shore gives way to the sea.
And the sea, my friends,
Does not dream of you.
-
Steven Erikson, Reaper's Gale
This poem has been living in my head in the past few days. Maybe it's because I've just seen the beach recently. Or it's because I like the meaning of it, that sometime we are hopeless in what to come and can only accept/embrace it.
beginlifeatforty.com
beginlifeatforty.com
) Debating turned into fighting, making fun of each other turned into insulting each other. Time went by and we have the Voz with its famous "uncivilized culture" of today.
